Not all red flags are deal breakers. If he’s living at his parents house to save money or is looking for a new job after being laid off, he might make a wonderful boyfriend. But some red flags have a bad reputation for a good reason.
If you spot any of these red flags in your new relationship, you don’t need to ditch him. But be wary. It’s good to get to know a guy slowly before you decide whether to commit.
1. No Female Friends? He may view women only as sex objects.
Beware of dudes who don’t have any female friends. There are several reasons why guys may avoid friendships with women, and none of them are particularly good. They’re either lying, view women only as sex objects, or actively dislike women.
Preferring the company of other men is a learned behavior, according to Dr. Max Blumberg, a researcher at Goldsmiths, University of London.
“It might well be created if a person is raised in a family which teaches them that they are ‘men’s men’ and that men and women have nothing in common therefore have nothing to talk about,” Blumberg said, in an interview with Metro.
2. His Mother is the Only Woman He Admires? He may not respect women.
Here’s a getting to know you question you probably haven’t thought about. Next time you go to dinner, ask him to tell you the woman he admires most, and why. Moms don’t count.
Despite the lack of women’s history education in elementary, middle, and high school, he should be able to come up something.
Plenty of heroes in American history were women, including activists like Hellen Keller, Harriet Tubman, Sojourner Truth, and Rosa Parks and adventurers like Amelia Earhart, Annie Oakley and Calamity Jane.
If he can’t think of a single women he truly admires, beware. He might not really respect women.
3. All Of His Exes Hate Him? He probably deserves it.
Here’s another good getting to know you question. Find out if he’s friends with any of his exes. If he isn’t, make sure to find out why.
He’ll probably be honest about the fact that all of his exes hate him. But it’s not a good sign. People are more like to keep in touch with their exes when they feel the breakup is civil: characterized by understanding and a lack of mean spirited behavior, according to a study of 260 undergraduate students.
If all of his relationships ended badly, yours is next.
4. Are All Of His Exes Are Crazy? He’s Probably Emotionally Immature.
You should always ask about a potential partner’s past relationships. If he says all of his exes are all crazy, he’s either looking for sympathy, trying to hide the details of his own misdeeds, or too emotionally immature to have a healthy relationship.
We put a lot of time and energy into our romantic relationships. When they end, it’s time to figure out what went wrong and why. Emotionally mature people analyze their past relationships to figure out what went wrong and how they contributed to unhealthy patterns.
If a potential partner can’t tell you how they contributed to the failure of their past relationships, they’re going to repeat the same mistakes.
5. He Feels Too Much Too Soon? Your relationship will probably end quickly.
It’s not unusual to say, “I love you,” after three months. But if he says it after three days, be wary.
Relationships that start with a major spark tend to burn out quickly. That’s not necessarily a bad thing. Every relationship doesn’t need to last a lifetime. But understand you may be in for a wild ride. Especially if your feelings are just as strong.